Lovers, Friends and Families

Self care
          Taking care of ourselves
Telltale signs present in early Tina use
Someone we care about is a problem Tina user

Taking care of ourselves

Many of us have a strong impulse to help and support someone we care about when we think they are having a problem with their Tina use. The degree of intimacy and relative importance of this person and our relationship to them will impact the extent to which we will want to try and help. We likely have more invested in a primary relationship than if our relationship is defined by friendship. Regardless or wither we are a friend, lover or family member of someone with problem Tina use, we are affected.

The ways we are affected will vary as will our experience to cope with the stresses associated with helping someone with their Tina use. Problem use, especially if it develops into dependence, has progressive impacts. Addiction is difficult for the user to manage and it’s difficult for the ones impacted by it to manage as well. How relationships feel and function will change. They may get worse before they get better.

Our ability to cope and manage the stresses of being in relationship with someone with problem Tina use determines how effective we can be in helping the person we care about. Many people in this situation report that one of the biggest lessons they learned was the need to take better care of themselves in the process. It’s easy to get drawn into the drama of dependence and Tina is the reigning queen of drama! It’s easy for the focus of the relationship to be about the one with the problem use. It’s easy to abandon our needs in this dynamic. It’s easy for us to succumb to stresses when we do this. The truth is we cannot help the one we care about or the relationship, if we are falling apart.

The articles in this section provide information to help lovers, friends and families understand the person they love's problem use as well as helpful tips and strategies. There is a wealth of other information elsewhere on the site written from the perspective of the user and exuser that may be helpful as well.

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